More Wicked Than Before!
On a completely different note, yesterday I went to the library to pick up a couple of things and since I had a bit of extra time, I decided to play around in the catalog. (Its not a card catalog if its in a computer, is it?) I was looking up historical textiles since I seem to have floral stripes on the brain lately and I was kind of wondering when they first made their debut. (If you care, it seems that woven stripe fabrics were first embroidered with flowers, long before fabric printing capabilities could create the type of thing I had in mind. If I had thought about it for 10 minutes I probably could have figured this out myself, but then I wouldn't have all this to babble about on the blog either.) So, I wrote down a number or two and went wandering, because half the fun of the library is the wandering. Anyway, when I got to the area of the first number I realized that either I had miswritten the number (probably) or the number was wrong in the computer (possible, but probably not). I found myself staring at books on hairstyles. Having way more time on my hands than is probably a good idea for a curious Pink Lemon, and my next appointment actually being a haircut, I began scanning titles. There were a number of books on matching your hairstyle to your face shape/lifestyle/attention span/ or doorway size. There were a couple of books on historical hair. The one that caught my attentions though was Big Date Hair. So my question is, is this book how to get hair for a big date, how to get big hair for any date, how to do your hair if your date is big? And why should an entire book be devoted to big hair/big dates with hair? Have I been missing out on some big hair possibilities? Does my husband feel like I haven't been putting forth the effort anymore because he never sees big hair? I mean, we've been married for 13-1/2 years and dated for 2 -1/2 years before that so for the last 16 years I haven't really been "out there." Apparently there are some hair rules that I missed out on.
Before I could really sink into the depths of Not Big Hair Despair, my eyes moved on to the titles a couple of shelves below. (You notice that I was never really quite curious enough to pull out Big Date Hair from the shelf and really take a good look at it. Somethings are best left to the imagination.) My eyes began scanning titles, and right after The Idiots Guide to Buying and Running Your Own Restaurant, (I think I should say right here and now, that if you use the idiot's guide to buy and run your own restaurant, maybe you shouldn't be in the restaurant business. I'm just saying) there it was: Solving Your Squirrel Problems. An entire book, 3/4 of an inch thick, devoted solely to squirrels. Not just a general treatise on smallish rodents - this was squirrels only, people. I've always felt that this kind of information could easily be covered in a brochure or informative postcard, perhaps free from your County Extension office. I had no idea that people had the kind of squirrel problems that required 3/4 of an inch of bound, printed matter. Maybe you're supposed to throw the book at them. (Side note to any Squirrel Rights Advocates out there: I am not condoning throwing books at squirrels, I am merely saying that maybe that is the author's/publisher's intention, however I did not take the time to really explore all of the techniques for solving one's squirrel problem so this might not be their intention either. We wouldn't want to give the little darlings psychological problems now, would we?) At that point, I had to get to my hair appointment, so the mysteries of Solving Squirrel Problems (maybe its a key part of restaurant management) were left for someone else to investigate. My stylist and I ended up discussing crazy neighbors we've had so I'm left to figure out my Not Big Hair issues by myself. I think I've got some hot rollers somewhere - that sounds like a good start...