Let me tell you about my weekend.

I really have to get this place whipped into shape and if the only way to do that is lectures at 2:00 AM, that's what I'll do. The biggest problem around here is that the house is cold. Even if I go all the way upstairs, where it's really quite pleasant in the summer, I'm not warm enough now. The people seem to think the house is fine. I know this because they haven't turned on the heat yet. Seriously, I watched the weather the other morning and its only getting up to about 70 degrees during the day. This is a problem. We need the heat.

My only alternative to freezing into a really cute cat-cicle is to sit on the people. There are some major problems with this though. Anytime I'm sitting on the people, That Dog Thing can get to me and snarfle me. My ear was wet all morning yesterday from a particularly disgusting attack (he's always more bouncy and causes more trouble in the morning than he is the rest of the day). Gross. Also, the Caleb person and Daddy person are wiggly and hard to sit on. The Mommy person is fairly well trained in keeping the cat warm (I think she's cold too, why else would she spend so much time knitting sweaters). This weekend though, she was playing with that yarn-y tube thing she always does (she calls it a sock, I call it annoying). It's bad enough that she has those pointy stick things that I'm not allowed to chase, but then there's the yarn. It always ends up trailing across my beautiful fur and tickling my ears and making me twitch. It's hard to sleep when you're twitching. Then, the more she messes with the tube thing, the longer it hangs down and eventually it starts bashing me in the head as she changes from one pointy stick to another. I mean enough already. Chew on the pointy stick things, put the string stuff away and wrap the cat in a blanket! My only options this weekend were to freeze to death or be bashed by Mommy's "sock," whatever that is. Oh, the things I do for survival.

I have no idea why I put up with this family. I've got to go, it's cloudy outside today so I'm going to sit in the window and meow at the sky until the sun comes out.